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The Brits love tea. Germans lust for beer. Americans are keenly attuned to processed foods, especially ones wrapped in a silver casing.

The Holy Grail of kid food is the Pop-Tart. If you want to see the sparkle return to the eyes of a grumpy teenager, just ask them about the sacred Pop-Tart. From favorite flavors to rules for unwrapping and eating, it gives kids a reason to live.

Since its introduction in the early 1960’s, there’s now a rich tapestry of Pap-Tart flavors: Hot Fudge Sundae, Chocolate Chip Cookie, Dough Red Velvet, Chocolate Fudge, Cookies & Crème, S’mores, and Wildlicious Wild Berry.

Let’s be real, there’s only one Pop-Tart – Brown Sugar Cinnamon. Yeah, I know the Strawberry people will disagree with this proclamation. But, the Brown Sugar Cinnamon is the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit of Pop-Tarts.

Regardless of the flavor, the presentation of a Pop-Tart heightens its joy. Hidden away in an opaque casing forces the eater to daydream with anticipation. And you’re not a Pop-Tart aficionado without a strategic plan for releasing the Tart from its tinfoil home.

If Pop-Tarts are the Holy Grail of kid’s food, then the runner-up is Krispy Kreme. Honestly, is there anything more beautiful than a Rainbow Krispy Kreme donut? It’s proof there’s a God.

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The Castle

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